Sunday, February 6, 2011

Siesta Key Beach State Park

The lady vyle And Myself Spend A Few Hours At Siesta Key Beach State Park, Florida
This past Thursday the lady vyle had a check-up at the Moffit Cancer Center in Tampa, so we decided that after it was over that we would go and spend the day at Siesta Key State Park which was a little further on down the road.  It was a two hour drive we  had made once before a couple of summers ago with the kids, of course when it was peak season.  It has been quite a while since the two of us have went so far without anyone else along.  It was good to have a chance to talk and enjoy the beginning of her four day weekend as she joined Me on vacation.

This Looks Familiar For Some Reason
Thursday morning was cloudy and overcast, which I am sure sounds nice compared to a majority of the rest of the country, which is covered with snow.  Maybe not exactly beach weather, but at least it wasn't raining.  We made our way to the park, a nice area where access to the beach is free.  The sand is a fine white powder which gets everywhere.  I had made the suggestion that we pull a From Here To Eternity if the beach was empty, but the lady vyle said there was no way she was getting that sand down in there.  If you have never been you have to add it to your list of places to go in Florida, but I would suggest you go in the off season.  Near the entrance is a strange and twisted tree which I think is actually two trees growing into each other.  I asked the lady vyle if she thought it looked familiar.  I have reason to suspect that it is a Vagina Tree.

The Lifeguard Station That We Sat Up Beside
We got out of the car and stripped to our suits, and then hauled out meager equipment which consisted of a small table, two beach chairs and a snack bag down to the beach.  There were seagulls everywhere, and not your little Wal-Mart parking lot or Central Florida landfill variety either.  I'm talking fat seagulls, and a few pigeons, that could pass as chicken when dressed out just right at your local butcher.  Of course the first order of business was to test the water.  Feets in for three seconds was enough of that.  It may be Florida but it was still fucking freezing.  Then after that we both needed to trek back to the entrance to use to the facilities, and that was when I first noticed the Vagina Tree.

Off Season At Siesta Key The Seagulls Outnumber Humans On The Beach

Pigeons (Foreground) Get Nice And Plump From Beach Living Too
Before having to head to the rest room the lady vyle and Myself combed the beach for sea shells.  She had hoped that since it was the off season things would not be as picked over as they were in the summer, but unfortunately this was not the case.  We were able to add some oyster clusters, black scallops and a few unique pieces of coral and barnacle encrusted shells to our collection.  Each of us had a collection of shells from here and there when we first met, and I was doing projects (filling shadow boxes and making plaques with shells) around that time as well.  So not long after we started dating she wanted to come up with a way to put our shell collections together.  The idea she hit upon to do so was with a fillable lamp, and we found one at International Market World in My hometown of Auburndale.  It was a slow  go in the beginning as the lamp was huge, huge enough to make out collective shell collections look small.  Now, however, as the years have went on it is nearly full and now contains shells we both had from childhood, a few store bought remnants of My art projects, fossil shells from My parent's yard, shells from Vero Beach, Castaway Cay, Royal Carribean's private island, Fairfield Beach and of course our previous trip to Siesta Key.

A Small Collection Of New Shells For Our Shell Lamp
Then it was time to take a seat and relax.  Aside from our trip to Castaway Cay on the Disney Wonder this was the first time that we had been to the beach without kids, and for Me it is the only time I have ever been to the beach without family (her parents were with us on that first cruise to the Bahamas).  I did forget to mention My first announcement when we claimed our spot was, "Okay, all you old farts need to avert your eyes, because we're about to get our freak on!"  Yeah, that got a laugh from the lady vyle, and unfortunately it did not happen.

In lieu of sex on the beach we decided to take sexy pictures of each other.  (YEAH RIGHT).  Well at least she looks sexy in all her pictures.

The lady vyle As Soon As She Had A Chance To Sit
Yeah That's Me Sucking It In And Trying To Look Buff, But I Still Look Like I'm In My Second Trimester
A Slight View Of The Perkies And Nips!
The lady vyle And "Friends"
After sitting for a little bit it was snack time.  The lady vyle had made sandwiches, and we brought along chips and crackers.  She had a Diet A&W Root Beer and I had a Sun Drop, which was second one of those I ever had, only having tested one out the night before.  Eating was a challenge.  The truth is the reason the seagulls at the beach are as big as chickens is that they make sure they get fed.  Eating under towels only helped some and did not keep one from taking a big whack out of My roast beef sandwich.  So if you do go to Siesta Key in the off season remember not to eat on the beach as there are not enough other people doing the same, so every bird on the beach is going to come right at you Hitchcock Style as soon as they hear the rattling of plastic.  We even had one persistent fucker who squawked at us almost the whole time we ate, although I am fairly certain for all his noise he didn't end up with a single scrap.

Snack Time!
This Mouthy Mother Fucker Got Nothing For All His Squawking And Cawing
Alas all things do come to an end.  We had a drive to be back at home in time for the end of the school day.  The sun did manage to come out a few times here and there and make it feel like summer, but most of the time we spent there was both overcast and foggy.  We actually ended up getting a little more sun on Saturday after spending most of the day at Typhoon Lagoon.

The Lovely lady vyle (Note Fog In The Background)
Me Beginning To Look Old Farty With My Seven 'O Clock Shadow At The Beach
Farewell Siesta Key Beach
And as we left and began our two hour trek back home I of course was left with one burning question...

Is This A Vagina Tree?

Master Vyle

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