Greetings Fright Fans, Fiends, Freaks,
Perverts and Sickos. Yeah, it’s been a
little VYLE, however, as promised in my last post, it’s about time for a
review. Up first in 2014, and after a
good year and a half lacking reviews, a 1982 piece of sleaze titled Bound Hooker
by Willa Huffner. Yes, fiends two of my
favorite subjects in one book. However
if you’re hoping to be educated, to glean a little knicky-knicky knowledge, on
either subject, this ain’t the book for you.
In fact this book could almost act as a template for Fifty Shades of Grey, because just like Erica Leonard, Ms. Huffner has no
clue or experience with bondage or domination, other than second hand
information from no doubt unreliable sources.
Bound Hooker is the story of Jane, our titular hooker, who, after a
snooze worthy gang bang, is whisked off to a room by one of the observers to be
offered a contract to act as the personal submissive for a group of ten men for
the next six months (or some shit like that), for which she will be paid
handsomely providing she does not quit before the end of the contract
period. From there she is whisked off
again to the apartment she will live in for the duration of her service, where
she is confronted by her cruel handler and videotaped as she is bound in a
humiliating position with a huge dildo shoved into one of her orifices (which seems
to be the main recurring theme in this novel).
Jane attends a party, after being in the
service of these mysterious ten rich guys for all of maybe two days, and having
only blown one of them is lent out to a lesbian Mistress for an unspecified
amount of time. (Believe me, this book
is loaded with a gaggle of unspecified shit.)
You see, Jane, who over and over again in this first person narrative
makes it plain that she is certified 100% straight, within five seconds of
meeting (or more like seeing her bound and humiliated at said party) supermodel,
Alexis, falls head over heels in love with her.
Can I get a, WHAT THE FUCK, brothas and
sistas?
Oh, yeah.
Beat that time, Anastasia Steele!
Yes, our confirmed, don’t like girls, but
loves to drink up sperm and be fucked in every hole by gangs of men heroine
spends somewhere in neighborhood of 85% of this novel eatin’ pussy and lovin’
it like McDonald’s.
After spending a couple of days with her
lady love, filled with corrupting a young sales girl, and separate bondage gang
bangs and various pussy lickin’ gang bangs, Jane is returned to her handler and
has a couple of idiotic scenes which do not pan out, and then is whisked away, again,
to somewhere in Europe for a bondage-gang bang retreat (or some shit like
that), with a little piss play and hints of incest thrown in for good measure. (Or as with everything else in this book,
just thrown in for no good reason.)
Then it’s back home, for her fourth day at
her apartment, which is apparently also the end of her six months of service.
WAAA?
She’s taken to the office of one of the
mysterious richie richies, where she is used and abused and offered another six
month contract, and from there the book goes on to end on a… Gee, I don’t know, a moronic note? Believe me, I’ve seen art films that had more
cohesion.
Okay, I know what you’re probably thinking,
with all this whisking around, and pussy lickin’ gang bangs, and regular gang
bangs, and the rest of the kitchen sink, this novel must be exciting. Oh, ho, ho, ho- NO!
This story was such a collection of tedious drudgery that it took me
nearly two and a half weeks to get through it, when it probably should have
only taken a day and a half.
Huffner’s style, and occasionally
spelling, leave a lot to be desired.
Plus, along with BDSM and prostitution, body piercing is another subject
that the author knows absolutely nothing about.
True this was first published in 1982, long before getting your tatas
and cha-cha pierced were all the rage, but it is only the fact that they’re
mentioned in the story at all that makes anything in it seem ahead of its time.
Also a point of interest, perhaps a little
unusual for an 80’s porn book, is the fact that it includes several, let’s say,
unique illustrations. They’re kind of
okay, if you like stylized, cartoony, characters getting it on. However, they really add nothing to the
overall, what little there is to it, story, as they pretty much have nothing to
do with the scenes they’re meant to correspond to, when they have anything to
do with the novel at all.
I give Bound
Hooker 1 and ½ Stars. It seems to be the only thing ever written by
Willa Huffner, and for that I thank her for not quitting her day job. If you feel the need to trudge through this
story (which if it had been written today by a standard indie hack would
deservingly be billed as the “next” Fifty Shades) it can be found on several
retro book sites, as well as at Barnes & Noble for NOOK.
See You After Vyle
 |
| Master Vyle |
You are dead wrong for this: "If you feel the need to trudge through this story (which if it had been written today by a standard indie hack would deservingly be billed as the “next” Fifty Shades)."
ReplyDeleteOh, no. I'm totally dead on.
DeleteI think you may be making a mistake assuming the book was written by a woman just because the pseudonym is female. And one can't tell for sure whether an author of one of these books has written anything else either. Ed Wood wrote loads of those kinds of books under a multitude of pseudonyms. And most of those novels were not based on personal experience any more than the guys who wrote the screenplays for films like The Wild Angels or Angels Hard As They Come knew how to ride motorbikes. The porn paperback industry was one of "pervertsploitation" - identify what the guys who buy paperbacks from dirty book stores want to read about and supply it. Sometimes there was a genuine interest in the subject on the part of the author. Ed Wood was genuinely into transvestism, but when he wrote about rape and necrophilia I'm sure he wasn't writing from personal experience or personal taste. The spirit of cynical exploitation which categorised the porn paperback industry lives on in the all of those Cherry the Cheerleader Bangs Her Daddy books, not to mention the dinosaur and tentacle erotica. Luckily, though, there are some erotica writers, like yourself, who express their unique personalities and passions in their writing. If erotica needed to be based on experience then mine would be shit, but I think it does need to be a personal expression of something we are passionate about not just something we think the suckers will eat up.
ReplyDeleteHaving said that, I occasionally enjoy a trashy porn paperback if it has some eccentric charm to it. Here is my review of Non-Stop Stewardesses by Michelle Wolfe :
Non-Stop Stewardesses was originally published in 1978 as one of those paperbacks you could only buy in adult bookshops. It's very much of-its-time which contributes to its appeal. But what makes it stand out from others of its kind is its sense of humour. Michelle Wolfe has a playful way with words and puts a good deal of imagination into the non-sex parts of the book, for instance one of the three stewardesses who are the main characters has a child who, at the age of four, expresses a distaste for the colour blue and doesn't like flying because the sky is boring. To her mother, who lives to fly, this is horrifying.
Where the book falls down somewhat is in the sex scenes which are, after all, the reason for the book. These scenes are written with a certain passion and are quite erotic, but she has a tendency to use crudely unsexy terms for parts of the body and also to repeat herself in such a way that many of the sex scenes seem as if they might have been cut and pasted from earlier in the book.
Still I have a nostalgia for Seventies smut and I had a lot of fun reading this book, so I would be glad to read anything else by the author. Unfortunately, I've been unable to find any reference to any other novels she may have written. But, who knows what other obscure smutty tales may be awaiting rediscovery by Olympia Press, who were responsible for republishing this one in paperback and ebook form?
http://www.olympiapress.com/catalog/product_info.php?products_id=1907&osCsid=a87bce9246a929cb31260205965082ce&keywords=stewardesses
I'm glad I visited the Olympia Press site to get that URL. It used to be that epub versions of books were the rarity there. Now they seem to be available for most of their titles. And with recently titles including The Adult Version of Jekyll and Hyde and The Adult Version of Frankenstein for only $1 each, I think I may need to add a few more titles to my e-reader.
I actually never assumed it was written by a woman, I just went with it, because looking at the draft where I had written she (/he?) looked too clunky so I removed all of those.
Delete